she should be happy. she was so worried and it seems like everything is ok. it seems like life is moving forward. you seem good.
and that does make her happy. it really does. you don't know how much. Thank God.

but it seems like it didn't happen. she/you are back to before it started and everything seems the same. was she repressive? did she get in the way? did you want to all along and she didn't let you?
guilt.
sigh.
at least it's reassuring. it's right.

experience is so fluid. one decision, one movement, everything changes. one second you're heading towards A, then a glitch, then you turn around and head to B.
today was supposed to be different.